The Hazardous Ent. Pub

OKAY THEN, pretty standard forum thin, basically you say what you would do in the pub (more specifically public area, but it tends to be a pub setting) and someone replies with what they would do, usually leading to comical and random scenarios...kinda the only thing i've ever thrived on in other forums...
so here i start

[ walks up to pub door, opens with key, stands behind bar]

[waits for others to come]
...
[pours self a pint]
...sweet

[Falls through the ceiling]

[wipes dust off of sleeve]

Sorry about that, can I get a pint as well?

[walks up behind bartender and pokes]

why'd you lock me in here over night

[sits next to Logan]

gimme jager bomb would ya?

[walks in front door, sits at the table]
-hey guys hows it goin, first rounds on me.
[takes a shot]
-damn that was hot, keep em commin

fuck, our it ourself, its your pub XD
kinda needs redecorating though now...
[dust falls out of the hole covering us]
...nice:S

[gets a ladder and places it under the hole]

[climbs up the ladder and looks at the hole]

Yup, that's a hole.

what caused you to fall through the ceiling anyways?

[Stumbles out from the back room holding a few half empty bottles]
I brought more party! -hic- for the booze!
[Falls face first onto the floor]

[...covers with a rug]
nuthin' to see here...

[a few jager shots later]

*drunk stuttery talk*
I'd like to -hic- make a...uh.. a toast [smiles]
[steps on the rug smg is under]
I love my friends and fans-hic- and especially that smg guy... where is he..

*Also shitfaced*

Ya i'm -hic- good too -hic- friends are nice -hic-

[Trips over the rug smg is under and stumbles backwards into a different room]

I'm okay!

[whole room shakes, wizard of oz style]
Oh cool, we got moved XD

LMAO!

[stands up from table 30 beers later]
im gonna go take a piss... -hic-
[stumbles 3 feet away and urinates on a rug]

dude, i'm pretty sure thats the same rug i put over SMG....

It's really cold in here...kind of like we're in a freezer...

[looks out of window]
thars snow on tham thar hills thar is i say.

[starts singing after taking a shot]
we need to put ahhh [thinks for a second] damb fuckinn... ahh.. keroka nana a kroaka, na na a kereoky masheen in heeere .... fuck im drunk...
[starts pooring another shot]

i dunno whats up with you guys...we never had any real alcohol anywayXD i got a pretty sweet deal on all this alcohol free stuff...

[starts to act normal]
what, you mean were not... damn it i was looking forward to being able to play the piano [family guy reference if you havent seen the episode ignore what you are reading]

you'll never play that wellXD
I do happen to have been given a ton of Ol' man Hickey's Moonshine though...

hell its worth a shot... lol

[serves out 'shine]
ok...if you burp, nobody light a match XD

can someone please serve me some lemonade

this is a bar not a lemonaid stand... lolz

[crawls out of the rug that had been rolled up and stuffed in the dumpster out back]
What the...
[runs back inside]

I ACCIDENTALLY THE WHOLE RUG!

[passes out again]